The Express Lane

Most people...actually ALL the people that I have met in my live can at least count to 20.  Let's face it...we have that many digits!  Twenty is a hard number to miss!  By Halloween in Kindergarten your average American kid has this figured out, if not long before that.  So tell me...WHY can't adults, capable of driving themselves to the store, shopping, paying for their merchandise and getting themselves home...WHY can't these very same people count to 20?  If I handed them 20 one dollar bills I'll bet they could count it.  If I locked them in a room with 20 angry skunks I'll bet my bottom dollar they could count them!!!  If I beat them upside the head 20 times with whatever random object is nearby I'm willing to bet they can count that, too, as they explain it all to the judge.  But I think that the judge would be on my side when I explain to him that the person....this example of common man....was in the Express Lane, 20 Items of LESS folks, with something like 40 items.  There are 26 cash lanes...four of them are Express Lanes...I realize that all 22 of the regular lanes are not open...only ten or so of them are open.  See....I can count.  

If you are paying with WIC you should not use the Express Lane unless it's the middle of the night and there is no other choice. 

Thirty cans of cat food do NOT count as one item. 

Separating the items in your cart into three different sales does not make it okay.  

If you are paying with a personal check and it takes you more than 30 seconds to write your NAME you should not use the express lane.  

If you are paying for your $50 order in coins you should not use the express lane.  

If you don't have your complete order ready to check out and let the cashier ring you up only to say that you're waiting for your daughter/son/husband/wife/whomever to return with the one thing you missed....then you shouldn't be checking out at all you self absorbed jerk.  

The cashiers cannot tell you no.  They have to smile and take your crap, within reason.  So rather than be a social idiot and annoy random strangers all around you next time how about you COUNT the items in your cart to make sure you have the right amount, make sure you have your payment ready, and move....after all, it's the EXPRESS lane!!!