So there were this brother and sister....the brother's name was Andy and the sister's name was Dee. Andy was in his mid-30's and Dee was in her mid-20's, so they didn't have a lot of childhood memories together, but they were family, all the same. Andy was in the habit of showering every other day. He felt that this was sufficient unless he did some kind of work that required more immediate cleaning. Dee showered every day, sometimes twice a day. She felt that this was absolutely necessary and that it should be necessary for everybody. Dee was troubled by Andy's refusal to change his habits. When she would confront him about not showering every day he would just tell her that he did what worked best for him and she should mind her own business. That wasn't enough for Dee, though.
First Dee tried to convince Andy that her way was better by showing him how good it made her feel to shower every day and by sharing various good reasons why she did so. Andy listened patiently, mostly, to her and then continued on about his day. He continued to be content and Dee continued to be bothered by his unwillingness to change.
Next Dee tried to shame Andy into showering every day. She began to tell him regularly that he was dirty, that his habits were ignorant, and that he was backwards. Andy began to be frustrated and angry at Dee because he knew that his life worked just fine for him and he did not feel any need to change. He didn't care if Dee showered ten times a day as long as she left him to do his own thing. The relationship between them grew tense and more and more often Andy would find himself feeling angry just talking to Dee about anything at all, much less the showering issue. Though somehow, anything they talked about always led back to that. So the only change was that Andy was now angry at Dee and Dee was increasingly frustrated. She would yell at Andy that his unwillingness to change was a real problem. He tried to explain to her that he didn't NEED to change, but Dee insisted he did need to change.
Finally, Dee took her argument out into the world. She went onto social media and called Andy out in front of all his friends, some of his co-workers, and anybody who cared to look. She insulted him, said that he probably smelled badly, and insinuated that he was unclean and generally nasty. She stated that she had tried to reason with him, that she had tried to make him see things her way, but that he had stubbornly refused any change at all and continued to live his life in ignorance of her better ways. Some people were completely on Dee's side and chimed in with their opinions and soon many people were bombarding Andy with their opinions about how often he should shower. Anybody who chimed in that they agreed with Andy were quickly shut down and driven off. Some people privately messaged Andy and told him they agreed with him, but they were unwilling to stand up and really get into the drama that was unfolding online.
Eventually, Dee got to Andy's employer and convinced him that showering daily was necessary for everybody. He made a rule that all his employees had to do this and so Andy began to shower every day. Andy now hated Dee and everything she ever said, stood for, or tried to do. If she had said that the sky was blue he would have sworn it was green. If she said that Oxygen was good, he'd have held his breath. For years Andy stewed in silence, living his life forced to adhere to somebody else's way of thinking. Then, one day, his boss was promoted to a new office. There were two people up for the position. One of those people had worked with his former boss for years and while he had his own ideas, things would pretty much stay the same. The other person was pretty new and hadn't worked for the company for long and didn't really know the job at all, but he did make it a point to tell Andy that if he got the job he would let Andy and anybody else who cared, live their own lives as they pleased. Despite his flaws, this man got a surprising tsunami of support from Andy and the many, many people who were tired of being forced to change. People who might not have minded change, really, if they hadn't been browbeaten into it and derided and abused for not being enthused about it all.
The new boss drove the company into the ground and everybody lost their jobs.
Have you ever heard the expression "Don't cut off your nose to spite your face"? That's basically the moral of this story. Apply it how you see fit. But know this.....if you think you are superior to others because you believe that your ideals and lifestyle are superior, then you're a huge part of the problem.
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