A Little Story

So there were this brother and sister....the brother's name was Andy and the sister's name was Dee.  Andy was in his mid-30's and Dee was in her mid-20's, so they didn't have a lot of childhood memories together, but they were family, all the same.  Andy was in the habit of showering every other day.  He felt that this was sufficient unless he did some kind of work that required more immediate cleaning.  Dee showered every day, sometimes twice a day.  She felt that this was absolutely necessary and that it should be necessary for everybody.  Dee was troubled by Andy's refusal to change his habits.  When she would confront him about not showering every day he would just tell her that he did what worked best for him and she should mind her own business.  That wasn't enough for Dee, though.

First Dee tried to convince Andy that her way was better by showing him how good it made her feel to shower every day and by sharing various good reasons why she did so.  Andy listened patiently, mostly, to her and then continued on about his day.  He continued to be content and Dee continued to be bothered by his unwillingness to change.

Next Dee tried to shame Andy into showering every day.  She began to tell him regularly that he was dirty, that his habits were ignorant, and that he was backwards.  Andy began to be frustrated and angry at Dee because he knew that his life worked just fine for him and he did not feel any need to change.  He didn't care if Dee showered ten times a day as long as she left him to do his own thing.  The relationship between them grew tense and more and more often Andy would find himself feeling angry just talking to Dee about anything at all, much less the showering issue.  Though somehow, anything they talked about always led back to that.  So the only change was that Andy was now angry at Dee and Dee was increasingly frustrated.  She would yell at Andy that his unwillingness to change was a real problem.  He tried to explain to her that he didn't NEED to change, but Dee insisted he did need to change.

Finally, Dee took her argument out into the world.  She went onto social media and called Andy out in front of all his friends, some of his co-workers, and anybody who cared to look.  She insulted him, said that he probably smelled badly, and insinuated that he was unclean and generally nasty.  She stated that she had tried to reason with him, that she had tried to make him see things her way, but that he had stubbornly refused any change at all and continued to live his life in ignorance of her better ways.  Some people were completely on Dee's side and chimed in with their opinions and soon many people were bombarding Andy with their opinions about how often he should shower.  Anybody who chimed in that they agreed with Andy were quickly shut down and driven off.  Some people privately messaged Andy and told him they agreed with him, but they were unwilling to stand up and really get into the drama that was unfolding online.

Eventually, Dee got to Andy's employer and convinced him that showering daily was necessary for everybody.  He made a rule that all his employees had to do this and so Andy began to shower every day.  Andy now hated Dee and everything she ever said, stood for, or tried to do.  If she had said that the sky was blue he would have sworn it was green.  If she said that Oxygen was good, he'd have held his breath.  For years Andy stewed in silence, living his life forced to adhere to somebody else's way of thinking.   Then, one day, his boss was promoted to a new office.  There were two people up for the position.  One of those people had worked with his former boss for years and while he had his own ideas, things would pretty much stay the same.  The other person was pretty new and hadn't worked for the company for long and didn't really know the job at all, but he did make it a point to tell Andy that if he got the job he would let Andy and anybody else who cared, live their own lives as they pleased.  Despite his flaws, this man got a surprising tsunami of support from Andy and the many, many people who were tired of being forced to change.  People who might not have minded change, really, if they hadn't been browbeaten into it and derided and abused for not being enthused about it all.

The new boss drove the company into the ground and everybody lost their jobs.

Have you ever heard the expression "Don't cut off your nose to spite your face"?  That's basically the moral of this story.  Apply it how you see fit.  But know this.....if you think you are superior to others because you believe that your ideals and lifestyle are superior, then you're a huge part of the problem.

What's Next....?

Well, so many changes have happened and are happening right now, and so many people are up in arms over it all.  I respect the exercising of rights seen last weekend around the country as people protested.  I don't think that the new administration really heard any of those voices, honestly, but history was made nonetheless.  Whether you love or hate the new administration one thing has become abundantly clear recently, and that is the incredible level of dependency on our Federal Government by average citizens.  Hell, even people in other countries appear depend upon our Fed Gov't.  And I just have to ask -- why?  Do we realize that it wasn't meant to be that way?  That these kinds of programs, the ones that are "under attack" now and being allegedly threatened by the new regime, all these kinds of things were meant to be handled at a state level, or even a community level, and never meant to be the domain of the Federal government?  Because we have allowed the Federal gov't to become so over-sized, so bloated in it's myriad of responsibilities, now we see actual fear that it may no longer continue to be the teat at which so many nourish.

Instead of panicking that the Federal Government may discontinue funding every single thing under the sun from PBS to the health care of women in the Congo, instead of being actually afraid and living in real fear that the Health Care System set up on a Federal level may disappear, instead of watching through our TV screens, and our phone screens, and our computer screens, if you really want a program to exist then learn how to make it happen in your own area.  All of these things can happen on a state level, or a smaller community level.  Just because something isn't funded by Federal dollars doesn't mean is HAS to disappear.  If enough people truly want something, they can make it happen.  I have absolute faith in the people of this country to be able to make all these things happen if they really want to.  It would take work, organization, and time, of course, but the infrastructures are all already there.  Contact your local politicians and ask them how you can make something happen.  You want to make sure that Meals on Wheels doesn't disappear and leave home bound people hungry?  Call your local politician and ask what you can do to help make it so.  You want to make sure that women have the right to choose?  Call your nearest Planned Parenthood and ask if there are any groups working toward those goals that you can join, groups who will visit politicians and really work to lobby for it. You want to make sure that arts are supported in your community?  Call your local Arts Council and ask how you can help.  You want to make sure that your local animal shelter has funding?  Call them!  They love volunteers and they probably have great ideas for fundraisers.  If you can't do something physically, donate money.  If you don't have the ability to help physically, or financially, you can write letters and make phone calls and help with organization.  Even if you're home bound and broke, you can find a way to help if something is that important to you.  Do some online research about health insurance programs at a state level, call a state politician and ask how you can help make that a reality or more widely available.  All these things don't just happen in a vacuum.  All these programs came into existence because somebody cared enough to get out there and do something, and they got other people who cared to help.  How so many things ended up suckling off the Federal milk doesn't even matter at this point.  The point now is to find ways to keep the things going that matter to you.

Maybe, just maybe, if all the energies so vigorously put into protesting, were now put into the day to day work of getting things going and locally funded and up and running without those Federal training wheels, maybe there would be a lot less fear and a lot more empowerment.

I know.....where to start?  Nobody really seems to know, do they?  That's because we've all been coddled for so long, it's all been done for us to the point that so many of us really have no clue how to get out there and do any of these things.  So it might take a little research.  Call a friend, brainstorm about ideas, then call somebody else.  Sooner or later if enough people care, and are willing to work, things will happen.  And one thing is for damn sure....the new administration isn't going to be helping any of us average citizens.  So if you need help, it's time to find other ways to go about it.  If you love something, it's time to step out, step up, and learn how to make it happen.  Because this is how it's got to be, if you want these things to continue.  We've turned over the power to a fickle authority and now it's looking like it may let us down.  Take that power back and do it ourselves, seems to me to be the answer.

It's time to stop hating.  It's time to stop being offended.  It's time to stop blaming.  It's sure as Hell time to stop waiting to see what happens next.  If you want something, NOW is the time to learn how to make that happen.  Yourself.  Right in your own community.  Take control!  Nobody is going to do it for you.